The Terrible Tantrums

The tantrum stage

Two year olds are just so adorable. You can see how much they learn on a daily basis. How they look at the world with excitement and adventure in their eyes. How playtime is filled with imagination. 

Where a sofa becomes a mountain that they are climbing slowly. Bath time becomes a full fledged adventure, where all the paw patrols have to join in to save one of the minions from falling into the rough seas. Where a simple game of tag becomes a life saving situation, where we need to call Fireman Sam to find mummy.

Two year olds are just so innocent and sometimes you just want a little bit of their excitement and adventure goggles. However ,with all the cuteness surrounding them, their little temper becomes a somewhat intriguing and blood raising experience.

We all have that one friend who is a hoot but given a little too much booze they become loud, argumentative, demanding, emotional, stammer and stumble . Having a two year old is like going out with that drunken friend, well at times :)

When  they are tired or when the day has too much adventure, temper tantrums seem to always be nearby. My son recently had a few and at first I wanted to have one along with him. The Vic’s commercial came to mind

The more angry I got, the more I lost control of the situation. Worse thing to do actually! I even started asking myself if i was spoiling him too much.

The thing is, at times all kids have meltdowns and its normal and natural. Especially when kids are tired. They take in so much in one day, their heads are spinning with new information and experiences and are going through all these emotions. When they don't get what they want and sometimes they don't even know what that is, its a recipe for a full blown tantrum.

Learning to deal with frustration is a skill that children gain over time. Tantrums usually start happening when kids hit their twos, as their language skills start to develop but they cant express their needs and feelings. When kids grow a little its their way of asserting their needs and desires and pushing as much as they can. I often look at my little one and think- wow he’s almost 3 and it feels like its a 'power struggle'. If he doesn't get what he wants when he is tired, tantrum city here we come.

So what to do if your kid has a tantrum.

1. Don’t lose your cool. A tantrum is not a pretty sight and its not your fault they are having it. Try to remain calm

2. Remember that you're the adult. So don't get into an argument with them. Give them their space. If possible try and ignore them. Yes that's right ignore them. Think about when you are having a moment when you just get mummy fever and have a 'breakdown'. No reasoning will help and ultimately, even although you don't want to admit it. You just want to be left alone. In that moment, nothing you can do or say will make the situation better.

3. Show them empathy and whatever you do- Don’t shout at them or threaten them, it just fuels the situation. If you can, do try and hug them to calm them down. After they had their moment that is.

4. Create a diversion. I sometimes try to change conversation or get all excited about something that i saw that i know might interest him.

5. Try to head off tantrum-inducing situations. When my son is tired i know that he starts becoming a little demanding. So I started avoiding certain situations which will get him really emotional or demanding.

6. After they have calmed down and forgot about the situation which caused the tantrum to begin with. Try to explain the situation to them calmly.

And what ever happens remember- Breathe. In and Out. Repeat.